Not Another Post About Michael Phelps!

My feelings towards the Phelps have been well documented on this blog. And I assure you, they remain largely unchanged. HOWEVER, I would like to publicly say that I don't blame him for letting his hair down a bit.
Swimmers are in large part (yours truly being one of the very few exceptions) party animals. A friend of mine who met an NCAA champ butterflyer (butterflier?) on a recruiting trip came back and told me "I didn't know one person could drink that much." So the Phelps isn't the only swimmer with less than Mother Teressa-ly conduct, and that's without factoring in the fact that he is a young man (albeit a freakish, dumb, fast one).
Not only that but I don't think people really understand what his life is like during serious training. Sure, they're all seen the human interest pieces about the billion waffles he has to eat a day or whatever, but they really don't understand the true meaning of "Eat, Sleep, Swim". Being restricted like that... it is understandable that he would go a bit crazy once he got his freedom. It happens to a lot of people, not just swimmers.
The Phelps is a simple man (the idea of successful swimmers being simple is a theme I've been meaning to write about, but haven't quite gotten around to). Do I think going out and partying, bong and all, is stupid and a wast of time and energy? Yes. But so is wasting your time watching MTV or being a creationist. Yes, I did just equate being a creationist with taking a hit off a bong, in fact being a creationist is dumber in my opinion. I actually don't think that smoking pot (though the practice has never appealed to me) is that bad, so long as you don't allow it to take over your life.
So Yeah... I had a point in that last paragraph somewhere... but I've forgotten it. Summery:

1. I still don't like the Phelps but the whole bong thing doesn't really affect the way I look at him.
2. This kind of thing could have happened to about +75% of the college population... except they're not world class swimmers, so get over it.
3. Swimming is very demanding.
   
4. Pot shouldn't be illegal.
5. That other point I was going to make but forgot.
6. Creationism is stupid.

And in honor of that last number I present to you, a picture of the Phelps... looking like Jesus.


Freak.

Phelps

So, in case you aren't swimming savvy (what a great word... savvy, hehe, two v's), that isn't really Milorad Čavić and Phelps didn't really give him the finger and what not. I decided to put a bit of humor in this post, because the rest of it contains very, very, very dark subject matter.

The Phelps.

I know that he has perhaps done a great thing for swimming. Putting our sport into the spotlight for once, and winning 8 gold medals, blah blah blah. That's all find and dandy. What isn't fine and dandy though, is the publicity nonsense that has come with it. The talk shows, the book... all of that. All of the things where he touts his hard work and effort; No, I'm not doubting that it took hard work and effort. I'm doubting the second part of his claim, that anyone (by anyone I mean the average Joe... or even the above average Joseph) could equal his feat if they put in the same hard work and effort he has.

I'm sorry Sir, but you need to stop lying to yourself. You are a FREAK OF NATURE. Not everyone has a 201 cm wingspan, or size 14 feet, or a freakishly long torso or any of the other ridiculous number of natural attributes in their favor. He is without a doubt the second... I'm giving first to Ms. Natalie Coughlin... most talented swimmer of our era- if not ever. He can't just gloss over that fact they way he is doing now, it isn't fair to the rest of us. There is no way I could equal what he does, with my 5'4" 135lb frame and duck feet, no matter how hard I worked.

He is also a cocky little jerk that needs to be brought down a few notches. I'm banking on people like Milorad Čavić and Cseh László to bring Mr. Phelps' head back down to size.

Swimmer's Gotta Eat Too Man!

As anyone who watched the Olympics at all this year probably has a pretty good idea, by way of Michael Phelps, as to how much a swimmer must consume to survive.

This is the best defense I can give for Kirsty Coventry, who recently took 100,000 USD from Zimbabwean President Bobby Mugabe. In case anyone has been in a coma the last few years, here is a little taste of the current situation. Price Controls and other idiot moves have pretty much left the country's currencey worthless and their economy in shambles.

But don't get mad at Kirsty. Get mad at Mugabe. For many things. Not just this. But also for this too, because if you can shell out 1ook to an Olympic swimmer, you ought to be able to throw a little bit of that towards not killing the rest of your country. Story here.